On Temporary Hiatus

 I know not many people read this blog, but I wanted to update nonetheless. 

As I mentioned, last month I lost someone very dear to me and my world has just gone upside down. I am struggling to function at all. I'm either eating too much or not enough and completely ignoring my body's natural cues. I'm exhausted and haven't been able to devote energy to exercise. I'm just not coping well at all.

I am still taking my Ozempic. That being said, I have been completely ignoring its cues. I don't get side effects based on what I eat, so there are no consequences other than I feel gross and I'm regaining weight. I am honestly grateful for that because I don't want to live my life that way with an artificial barrier interfering with my food choices. My response means I have to manage my food intake on my own and I prefer that.

For the time being, it's not conducive to my mental health to be focusing on weight loss. I'm currently focused on just basic survival. That being said, I am trying to at least get to reasonable dietary habits for my health rather than the swing back and forth between not eating and eating too much. I'm also trying to get to the gym simply for my basic physical health.

I'm doing the best I can. Lately that's not very good, but it's the best I can. Getting on the scale when I'm drowning in grief is not going to be a good thing for my mental health, so I'm not going to be doing weekly weigh ins right now.

I'll still write when I can, and I'm not planning on this being a dead end to my blog, not that people ever plan those. But I'm still taking my meds, and I haven't modified my gym subscription yet because I want to have the ability to go when I am able to. I'm wearing my gym clothes today- my plan is to go.

This is one of those life's blows that I've got to make it through and come out the other side without ruining all my hard work, but first I've just got to survive.